We round up the best (and worst) of the quips, gags and gaffes from the last week in sport. This week we've got Roberto Mancini assessing Mario Balotelli's mental state and caffeine-addict Laura Robson on tour...
"Mario needs two. And then after you'll need another two."
Maybe it will be the psychiatrist that will need to seek help after dealing with Mario Balotelli.
"You come from a council house and before you know it you're playing Man United."
Errr....this was Jonjo Shelvey's excuse for swearing at Sir Alex Ferguson.
"I'm using every profanity I know right now, plus a few I've just invented!"
Julian Dollar did his best to attrack Fergie's attention.
"There were a few Diana Ross wigs and there was a blonde one that Francesco Molinari was wearing. He thought it made him look like Marilyn Monroe."
We were thinking more Dolly Parton, but we're not one to argue with Nicolas Colsaerts.
"This is a press conference about a bloody football match. I'm not answering that. Christ."
Unlike Colsaerts, Ferguson was in no mood to chat about the Ryder Cup.
"I don't think it's China because I haven't really left the hotel in Guangzhou or here (Beijing) yet apart from to to go to Starbucks.
Caffeine-addict Laura Robson clearly isn't one for sightseeing.
"We have actually revised the qualification for next time. It's nine spots, two picks and Poults."
Lee Westwood admits Ian Poulter deserves a lifetime membership of the European Ryder Cup team after his performance at Medinah.
For the rest of the week in words, check out our Quote/Unquote section.