Our weekly collection of the most ridiculous sporting quotes takes in Andy Murray, Novak Djokovic and Mario Balotelli's agent this week...
"I am crazy? Go and ask the club what their price would be."
If Balotelli's agent is anything like his client, then we assume that question is rhetorical
"I notice Carson's slimmed down and looks trim but that big head of his hasn't shrunk down."
Kell Brook began the war of words with shock opponent Willie Carson
"For him to strike with me standing up, he'd have to be a magician."
Meanwhile, Anderson Silva v Paul Daniels continued to gather steam
"He is an egotist, who thinks the world revolves around him. Guys like Balotelli deserve lots of slaps."
So spoke the notoriously calm Paolo Di Canio
"Mike Tyson has said he often walked to the ring petrified he might lose."
Murray invoked the one-time heavyweight great - fair enough, but it's slightly more painful losing a boxing match
"I don't know [what my dog will say]. I guess he will be disappointed. I'll see when I'm home."
Djokovic's smart-taking dog had started to overshadow his career
"Allowing him a buy-out clause was bloody silly."
Montpellier president Louis Nicollin on the transfer Olivier Giroud to Arsenal. Yes, but surely not as "bloody silly" as people thinking Giroud wasn't a replacement for Robin van Persie
For the rest of the week in words, check out our Quote/Unquote section.